Small Spill, Bigger Revelation...

Someone recently shared an experience that stayed with me, not because of the water that her baby spilled at an event she attended, but because of what happened around it.

The lady had been an attendee to a small community music show on invite from one of her friends who happened to be a performer at the show. At the show, her baby accidentally dropped a bottle and the water splashed onto the floor. Apparently not a major issue or rather just a normal thing that can happen to any parent.

But the organizer, who was also the director of the show, stood right behind her and murmured about the mess, which assumingly he clearly knew it came from her baby.

Feeling embarrassed, she quickly grabbed some tissue and bent down to clean the floor. The director who saw her doing this, didn’t stop her or wasn't courteous enough to say, “It’s okay, we will handle it.” At the time she went to get more tissues, a girl arrived with a mop who was obviously sent by the director and then instead of letting the girl handle it, the director himself took the mop, walked over with a strange, rude expression on his face, and mopped the remaining right in front of the lady. The lady stepped back quietly, feeling small and a bit humiliated. By all means, this was not exactly the way guests are supposed to be treated, she thought.

Later, the lady told this incident to her best friend, who was also one of the performers in the show. She expected sympathy or maybe even a little anger from her friend on her behalf. Instead, her friend said nothing, no support, no acknowledgment that the director's behavior was rude. Much later, her friend casually commented, “Your enemy (director) didn’t get dessert, so be happy.”

The lady thought - "Your" enemy it was and not "our" enemy. There was not even a hint of shared discomfort or support from her friend. That was when the woman realized this was her problem alone. Her friend wasn't angry or hurt for what happened. The friend even had complaints about other performers that night, but somehow had zero criticism for the director, almost like he could do no wrong in her eyes. Her friend clearly held the director in high regard like a family and was not willing to question him under any circumstance. Her loyalty to her director who gave her the opportunity outweighed her empathy for the lady.

True friendship isn't tested during celebrations, it's tested in moments of discomfort. The lady was not angry but disappointed, because she knew that if the roles were reversed, she would have stood by her friend without hesitation. But when she needed the same support, it simply wasn’t there. Of course, in this case having an ill feeling for the director also would mean potentially jeopardizing the opportunities her best friend hoped to receive from him and that provides a clear rationale for her best friend's response.

---

#FriendshipTruths #RespectMatters #EmotionalBoundaries #KnowYourWorth #SelfRespect #TrueColors #LifeLessons #GuestEtiquette